I’m so confused, why am I always sad but happy…

I’m so confused, why am I always sad but happy?

why do I feel like shit but always smile?

And why can’t I figure out why I’m feeling this way???

Why am I so nice to people but people don’t know that I exist?

Why do people dislike me?

Why do people’s opinions matter???

Why do all these thoughts come through when I’m all alone?

Why do I say I’m alone but there’s people that care for me?

Where are these people?

Why don’t they talk to me??

I hate being alone